Shit Phil Says…

• 
  The New Porn Renaissance…November 28, 2020
  There are many reasons why the 70s and 80s were known as the “Golden Age of Porn,” but for me, there’s one big OBVIOUS reason: […]
• 
  Someone Needs to Invent ‘The NanoBagel’November 22, 2020
  This unassuming bagel may look like a plain bagel, but it’s actually any flavor bagel you want — thanks to miracle of nanotechnology, and your […]
• 
  Jesus Came.November 21, 2020
  It’s believed that Jesus Christ lived to be 30-something before his father murdered him to a cross so we could all be degenerates. To think […]
• 
  That’s What You Get You Stupid Bitch.November 20, 2020
  I was walking out of Kroger this evening when I noticed a woman struggling with some bags. I offered to help her to her car […]
• 
  Thanksgiving Dinner Except it’s Coke and a Threesome, for Me.November 18, 2020
  Ugh, it’s the week before Thanksgiving… I can feel the cold, I can feel the anxiety growing in my friends and family as they start […]
• 
  Ungrateful Cunt.November 15, 2020
  So I was in the checkout line at Kroger today getting shit to make fajitas and the woman in front of me was freaking out […]
• 
  Fucking Hot, Young College Chicks for Fun and Profit.November 12, 2020
  I’m 45 years old (or something like that) and single, with no desire to be in a relationship any time soon. If it were to […]
• 
  Even the Best Laid Plans Can Go to Shit.November 11, 2020
  I always like to think of myself as the Hannibal character from The A-Team. Not the Liam Neeson one, but the George Peppard one. You […]
• 
  How to Unlock and Enjoy SCREW TV on Roku…November 10, 2020
  SCREW TV is no longer billed through Roku and is now available exclusively to SCREW MAGAZINE digital subscribers as part of your subscription plan. If […]
• 
  Jack Me Off?November 7, 2020
  Now that Kamala Harris is our first African-American and South Asian and Female Vice President all rolled into one, her husband Doug Mehoff becomes the […]

Previous Posts