SCREW #218 for May 7, 1973 begins with Emmett McConnell’s cover illustration: a drag hallucination with a twist — Al Goldstein’s unmistakable face slapped onto a naked Playboy-ish bunny, complete with big titties, that dumb smirk, and a freshly plucked carrot at the ready. At first glance, it’s cartoonish. But give it a second look — and there it is. Just to the left of that eager orange root… a sly shimmer of wetness.
Almost harmless. Almost.
And that was the SCREW magic trick—what looked like a gag turned out to be a middle finger aimed at every sanitized fantasy Playboy ever sold to middle America. Fuck you, Hef.
Inside, Jim Buckley kicks things off with a throat-clearing “Screw You” that’s less editorial and more verbal arson. He sets the tone: no apologies, no disguises, no mercy.
Lynda Crawford dives deep into sapphic nightlife in “A Visit to a Dyke Bar: The Twilight World of Lesbian Love,” documenting the grit, warmth, and rules of engagement in a world most straight men only dreamed about—but never understood.
Gail Bryce turns up the pressure with “Whither Massage Parlors?”, a journalistic finger in the chest of America’s backroom sex economy. She strips down the industry of “rub joints,” revealing not just the hands, but the politics greasing every palm.
Meanwhile, Al Goldstein double-fists his bylines. In “The Shit List,” he tears into his enemies with the precision of a drunk surgeon. Then in “Dirty Diversions: Dutch Dork,” he trashes the 1971 Dutch skin flick Blue Movie produced by Wim Verstappen — which obviously steals its name from the 1969 Andy Warhol flick — with venom so rich, it reads like love turned sour.
Interestingly enough, Verstappen’s Blue Movie was the first theatrical release in the Netherlands to show sex scenes and an actual erection on screen.
Michael Perkins’ “Fuckbooks: It Takes Two to Fuck But Anyone Can Tango!” is a literary stroke session, where he lovingly dissects the novelization of the hit film Last Tango in Paris. And Paul Krassner’s “Rumpleforeskin” skewers Olympic golden boy swimmer Mark Spitz as having a head full of chlorine and confusion for wanting to leave sports to become a dentist.
Bruce David serves up the sleaze round-up in “Sex Scene,” while John Caldwell’s comic adds visual perversion to the textual kind. Anthony Gambino’s “Naked City” snapshots our sprawling filthscape, and John Milton’s “Mail Order Madness” explores the scams, schemes, and sticky catalog pages of America’s favorite private pastime.
But back to that cover—because that was the real act of subversion. Not just Goldstein in drag, not just cartoon tits, but a barely-there flick of vaginal moisture that made it art, porn, parody, and protest all at once. That little shine? That was the wink. The dare. The fuck you to every cocksure man who thought he could handle it.
SCREW #218 was a challenge disguised as a chuckle. A cumshot wrapped in critique. And a bunny with more balls than Hef ever dared.
We miss that kind of mischief. But lucky for you, it’s all in the vault.
—P.
